The parenting secrets we don’t share
We all have dirty little secrets. You know, the kind that you would be mortified if anyone were ever to find out. Most people’s deepest secrets are well kept. My parenting secrets are not.
I have an autistic son with no filter and he ensures that no secret is safe in our house.
The one thing I have learned from frequently having my secrets shared, is that they are far more common than you would think. Here are a few of my parenting secrets that I am confident at least some of you might be keeping as well.
1. I drink water straight from the bottle, but I make my kids drink from a cup. You know the saying “do as I say, not as I do?” That’s my motto.
2. I don’t change wet sheets in the middle of the night. My older kids can do it themselves or they can throw down a towel. (I do make sure they shower in the morning.)
3. I occasionally give my kids melatonin when I need some peace. My son loves to drag the bedtime process out until my nerves are shot. Call me selfish, but there comes a time where kids need to be in bed and parents need to unwind. If that means I have to hand out doses of melatonin, so be it.
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4. My kids wear dirty socks. Sometimes when there are no clean socks, I tell them to wear yesterday’s socks, even though this sort of grosses me out. (I hope no one smells their feet…)
5. My kids get junk food for breakfast. When everyone and everything is running late, we are out of cereal, the bread is still frozen, and my daughter insists she only wants cookies for breakfast, I give in. Because it’s better to eat cookies then to go to school with an empty stomach, right?
6. I occasionally lie to my kids. Don’t look so shocked. It really is a matter of life and death. When I throw away their art work or eat the last piece of mouth-watering chocolate. A little white lie keeps them from needing therapy and saves me. It’s a win-win.
7. I blame my kids for things that they might not have done. For example, I tell my husband that all the wrappers found behind the couch belong to the kids or that they’re the ones that broke his iPod. Anything that gets me off the hook.
8. Sometimes, I forget to remind my kids to brush their teeth. I just get so wrapped up in the more important things in life, like making sure they’re fed, bathed, and doing homework.
9. I pretend to be asleep when my kids wake up in middle of the night. I even snore a little for effect, until my husband cannot take it anymore and gets up with them.
These are my confessions. I’m not perfect, but none of us are and you know what? It’s okay.
Rebecca Beck is an Ultra Orthodox Jewish mother of two. Her blog Orthodox Sunflower is a rare glimpse into the Hasidic way of life. She has has been published on Yahoo! Style, YourTango, Scary Mommy, Mamapedia and Sammiches and Psych Meds. Follow her on Facebook and Twitter.
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6 and 9 for sure! As for the melatonin, I’m the one who needs a steady supply of that. I also wish I were walking around with a steady drip of valium, lol!
Ha!! You have a point!! Thanks for reading!
Love Rebecca and follow everything she does loyally! This is just a glimpse into her honesty,sincerity, and occasional hilarity. Love you, mama. Keep up the good work. FYI: sometimes Alex wears dirty socks too! I also have eaten his chocolate and pretended I had no idea what could’ve happened to it. Mom of the year! Lol
Love you too! Thanks for being such a supportive and loyal friend!!
“I pretend to be asleep when my kids wake up in middle of the night. I even snore a little for effect, until my husband cannot take it anymore and gets up with them.”
All the time. My husband keeps commenting that I must really be exhausted from work since I never hear the kids wake. ;p
I cannot believe they still fall for it ??! Thanks for reading!
My 13 yo daughter never. stops. talking. EVER. Twice a week or so, I pretend to have a headache just to get her to stop talking to me for a little while.
I’m incredibly grateful that she talks to me because I know that most teenage girls don’t want to talk to their moms. But I can only take so much of the play by play of who said what to who during lunch and why so-and-so is mad at her BFF because she told some boy that she likes him before I start to get an eye twitch. ???
Yes, same with my son! Thanks for reading!
I hide chocolate and eat it all! Also, did the pretend sleeping thing! Also, told them there was no food and to just eat cereal a few times because I was too lazy to get off the couch!
Lol! Sounds familiar! Thanks for reading.