I’m a mommy blogger and I effing like it
Turns out it’s a little bit of a slow day in the Robbins household.
The rain is giving me the perfect excuse to postpone my trip to the grocery store, my housework is done and my kids are zoned out in front of The Force Awakens for what feel like the 857th time, so I guess I have a minute to share my thoughts about little blog post that’s going viral around the internets today.
The post I’m talking about is called “Dear Mommy Blogger” written by a mommy blogger named Josi who vigorously insists she’s not a mommy blogger…anymore. She posted it in a Facebook group where bloggers share their work with an intro of “Your Mommy Blog Fucking Sucks” followed by #sorrynotsorry.
I’ve read – and enjoyed – a lot of Josi’s writing. She seems to be going through some sort of transformation, and like many of us, she probably finds writing cathartic. I’ve seen her go from writing chirpy blog posts about how much she loves her KitchenAid to raw essays about how her deadbeat ex doesn’t pay child support for their three children.
She posted “Dear Mommy Blogger” yesterday and asked for feedback. From other mommy bloggers.
I read the intro about how she rocked the world of mommy blogging (she's awesome and she'll tell you all about it) but when I got to this part:
“Your mommy blog fucking sucks no one is reading your shit,”
and I rolled my eyes sky high and clicked exit. I like a good rant now and then but I decided I had more important stuff to do, like catch up on Candy Crush and organize my kitchen junk drawer. Do you have that one drawer in your kitchen that's just a catch-all for crap?
[Tweet “I'm a #mommyblogger and I effing like it”]
In the past 24-hours, I’ve seen “Dear Mommy Blogger” in my Facebook newsfeed about half a dozen times. It’s being discussed and picked apart in the blogger/writer circles. People either love it or hate it. When I saw the avalanche of counterpoint posts start to emerge, I decided to give in and read the entire post.
Man. I rolled my eyes so hard I think they almost got stuck in the back of my head there for a minute.
In case you don’t have the time, energy or stomach to read a 3,000 word manifesto about how mommy bloggers suck, let me give you the Cliff Notes:
Moms bloggers suck. We are fake, soulless time-wasters who use too many exclamation points. Oh wait – we are fake, soulless time-wasters who use too many exclamation points!!!! There, that’s better!
There are about a dozen F-bombs (in case that kind of thing bugs you) and there’s a lot of talk about give-a-ways and a quote from The Feminine Mystique that just kind of confused me. It ended with a call to action to save yourself now and quit mommy blogging…because your blog sucks.
I thought it was mean and I don’t like mean. I try not to be mean…sometimes I screw up, blow up and say or do things I shouldn’t but if at the end of my life, people say “We’ll miss that Jill. She wasn’t a douchebag,” I’ll count that as a win.
And yeah, I kind of took this whole “Your Mommy Blog Sucks” post personally.
Because you know what? I’m a mommy blogger and I effing like it.
The term “mommy blogger” has mixed reviews in the blogging underworld. Did you know there was a blogging underworld? Actually, it’s a bunch of secret Facebook groups where we talk about reach and engagement, plugins, algorithms, keywords and other sexy stuff. Anyhoo…the term “mommy blogger” bugs some mommy bloggers. I guess people think it’s negative or fluffy. Whatever.
I don’t walk up to strange people and say “Hi, Jill Robbins, Mommy Blogger.” Actually, I’m an introvert so I try not to walk up to strange people at all, but you know what I mean. My business card says “Freelance Writer” and I think that better describes what I do, since I’m super fancy and get paid for some of my writing now. I don’t refer to Ripped Jeans and Bifocals as a “mommy blog” but as an online community for parents. But, if you want to call it a mommy blog, no big whoop. I’m easy going.
I don’t feel the need to defend myself or respond to everything on the internet I don’t agree with, but while Josi is sitting back and reaping the rewards of a rant gone viral (and while my kids are glued to the boob tube) I felt like chiming in.
Because I’m a mommy blogger and I effing like it.
People do “read my shit” and like it. I don’t dabble in the world of product review that much but I have taken on some paid work for brands who want to get their products in front of my audience. I’ve written about everything from bladder supports to frozen yogurt to cheese in a voice that’s…well, my voice. My real voice. Sponsored work and ads help fund the cost of running my website and allow my family to have some nice things we couldn’t have if I didn’t blog. I have zero shame about that.
I have a soul. I happen to love exclamation points!!! I am essentially a happy person who gets excited about cheese. Neither my life nor my “mommy blog” are presented as rainbows and unicorn farts. In fact, my hardest day as a parent is what started me writing in the first place.
The 20,000 people that follow my blog through email and social media are seeing the real me. I’m not fake. I have good days and bad days. Some days, I am almost positive the Mother of the Year people are going to ring my doorbell and give me a bottle of wine, a new pair of yoga pants and a Starbucks gift card…because if there were a Mom of the Year Trophy, it would be that, amiright? Other days, I’m hiding in the bathroom with my Kindle and a bag of Hershey kisses and my husband takes care of the kids because I tell him “I’m pooping.”
And I write it all down. I’m a mom blogger and that’s what I do.
Blogging and writing gives me an outlet for the word jumble that spins in my head. It allows me to connect with people: to make them laugh, make them think and most of all, to make any parent out there, adoptive or otherwise, know that it’s okay to admit you struggle and have those “OMG I’m a sucky mom” kind of days.
Josi pays for her domain and pays for her blog to be on the internet just like I do. She’s allowed to say what she wants to say. If she wants to trumpet the “you suck” message to mommy bloggers everywhere and then sit back and giggle as the page views on her monetized blog climb and the impressions from the ads and affiliate links go “CHACHING” into her bank account, then more power to her.
As for me, I'll keep on oversharing about my love of wine and coffee and my life as a mom in general. I'll keep on complaining about how little sleep I get and how much I hate my muffin top. Because I'm a mommy blogger and I effing like it. So there.
I'll leave you with a quote…and if you find this share-worthy, click on the image and it will take you to the Facebook page where this graphic was created and the lovely lady who made it will get proper credit:
Thank you for reading!